One lady just walked into the clinic saying, ‘I want to see a pediatrician.’
I politely replied, ‘what is wrong with your baby?’
Let me know if I can help. If you need to see the pediatrician, I will refer you ‘
‘No doc, I just want to see a baby-doctor!’… she replied tersely.
‘It does not work that way ma’am, there should be a referral’, I tried to explain.
‘Ok then, please refer me!’ she said getting inpatient and using a fake accent.
‘At least I should have an idea of what is wrong with the child before I can make a referral’
‘My child is teething and I bought pican for the teeth. So I need him to tell me how to take it! She answered at last.
I almost hissed.
‘So can I get a referral now?’ she asked, sounding petulant.
Here was my epic response;
“Your Health Maintenance Organization plan does not cover specialist review. To see a pediatrician means you will pay out of pocket and it will cost you N30,000’
Then, I gave her a wide smile seeing that she now appeared sober and somber.
She adjusted in her seat again and looked calmer.
‘What is 30k for…?’ She asked in surprise.
‘Well, it’s for a consultation with the pediatrician. All the gist you have about the baby doctor is all included in the N30,000! It is the approved specialist fee since your health insurance premium does not cover specialists consultations.’
‘Wow!’ She shouted
‘Ehn, ok. But I can see you abi?’
I laughed heartily and said aloud, ‘Yes’.
HMO Patients… what a funny bunch indeed!!!